In response to the shooting death of Mary Spears in Detroit.
I cant make this shit up. Men……..I swear they just don’t understand the fear of being a woman
hek23 “Ok I’m confused, women do you want a thug or not?”
It seems like a hideously shitty idea to give your number to someone who’d physically attack you for not giving it.
"Oh, a person that dangerous and unstable definitely won’t use my number to call me or find out where I live or stalk me or anything!"
Not sure if dude here is really dumb, talking about fake numbers, or just using potential violence as an excuse to try and convince people to give him numbers.
What they usually ignore is that giving fake numbers will put you at risk as well
Men have gotten smarter by calling that number right in front of you to make sure that is your number
That calling the number right in front of me shit happened to me a couple times.
Thankfully, none of those dudes EVER called me again, but the fact that they would call the number with me standing there would fill me with dread and tell me immediately what kind of person he is.
Like, nigga, IF it’s a fake number, WHAT you gon DO to me?
I think they were just asking for my number for sport, cause they never actually called me again,
But I shudder to think about how many times this could have been me,
How it angers me that I have to ‘have a boyfriend’ because dudes will respect another man before they’ll respect ME and my right to not want they ass.
Actually Tashabilities… she told him that she had a boyfriend. And Thats when he killed her.
THE ACTUAL HELL MAN?! I can’t.
Every possible scenario when a man tries to kill a woman over her phone number, people will find a way to blame her for what he did:
- You ignore him, so he attacks you. “Why couldn’t you just be polite? Why would you provoke someone who was obviously violent?”
- You try to politely turn him down, so he attacks you. “Why couldn’t you just pretend to be interested? Why would you provoke someone who was obviously violent?”
- You fake interest because you’re scared he’s going to hurt you. He thinks you’re serious and won’t leave you alone and then he attacks you when you finally try to shake him off politely with a totally reasonable excuse. “Why’d you lead him on? Why would you encourage someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your phone number to get him to leave you alone. He starts calling you a lot, but you don’t answer, so he tracks you down, and then he attacks you. “Why did you give him your phone number? Why would you encourage someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your fake phone number to get him to leave you alone. He realizes it’s not your real number, so he attacks you. “Why would you give him a fake phone number? Why would you provoke someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your real phone number and you try to be nice when you call. Eventually he realizes you’re not actually interested and attacks you. “Why did you lead him on? Why would you encourage someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your real phone number and end up being harassed into a relationship with someone who is obviously violent because you are scared for your life. He eventually tries to kill you anyhow for nebulous reasons that ultimately boil down to: he can’t completely control you the way he wants to because you are a person, not a doll. “Why do women date violent men? I don’t understand why they don’t just leave.”
I’ve heard all of these arguments in all of these situations. Men use harassment, coercion, and violence to try to get what they believe they are entitled to from women, and the woman gets blamed no matter what. Men are never expected to take responsibility for their bad behavior, because their sense of entitlement is never questioned by our misogynistic patriarchal society. In our warped society, it is reasonable for men to expect that women should be compliant, should be willing to give any man who wants them exclusive rights to her body, sex, affection, and love, and so it is reasonable for men to become violent when a woman acts in any way that denies men control over her person.
Therefore, when a man gets violent, the problem is not the man and his sense of entitlement, it is the woman, who didn’t do “what she was supposed to” even if there is absolutely nothing she could do, short of giving up her autonomy and personhood entirely. And men who get violent when women refuse to comply do so to remind them: if you won’t surrender your personhood willingly, we will take it from you by force.
This is about control, not a phone number.
Why all men are responsible for stopping this. ALL MEN
She did everything she -should- of done. He was the one who did what he -shouldn’t- of done and killed a woman for saying no.
The only thing she could of done was kill him first.
That last comment… damn. It hurts.
I feel horrible about this because I used to feel the way this guy did, so I can see exactly where he’s coming from. He’s not trying to be a scumbag. He’s just thinking at it in the way that guys are taught to think — that you need to stand up for your own well being because you can’t control how others act. This was drilled into my head at an early age and I had amazing parents.
I vocalized this very same thing before. I remember baenling immediately called me a ‘rape sympathizer’ because of it. I was completely taken aback because I simply didn’t realize just where my fault was. I was ignorant to the way women are treated and the absolute threat of society. My mind was still in the period of ‘look out for yourself, because no one will look out for you’. This was two years ago. I like to feel that I’m more knowledgeable now, but I still have a damn long way to go. There is no one to blame for this aside from the man who pulled the trigger, and *all* men need to be vigilant about people like this and take a stand against it.
"I like to feel that I’m more knowledgeable now…" god, don’t we all? I used to pride myself on being informed and the older I get the more I realize I don’t know shit. I used to think I was justifiably angry about some things but I know now that I’m not nearly angry enough about the things that really matter and some things that I accepted I shouldn’t be. It’s depressing.
hamlet is much funnier if you only read the margins and not the actual dialogue
ALL HAIL THE HAM KING
"Disney Villains Perfume" by japanese artist Ruby Spark.
i saw that one was missing
THE LAST ONE
my fucking head omg lolol}}
There is a restaurant around here that does tell you the prep time for foods actually, and it’s really awesome.
I love it when my supervisors power trip together for no good reason
like, is this 1st grade? let’s be adults and tell me where my new desk is.
wtf is wrong with all of you, they are desks. why is this so secret
My TA and friends in the classroom across the hall once managed to cram my new desk into the utility closet with the help of all 24 little co-conspirators in both rooms. I know they were in on it because every time I asked if it wasn’t supposed to be here yet I got a chorus of guilty little hee hee hee’s. Check the bathrooms and behind the water cooler.
I hear this nommng noise and I look over and someone is eating the label off the ketchup bottle. I let him have some ketchup on meatloaf earlier, so he knows that red stuff tastes pretty nice! WHO IS EATING MY KETCHUP BOTTLE, says I.
He has no idea. Certainly not birb.
Remember the floating candles from Harry Potter?
Here’s a clever idea: Use paper towel holders and LED lights to recreate it. Hang your creation with clear fishing line from the ceiling for the floating effect!
Makes for the perfect Halloween party atmosphere!
all year round autumn/halloween blog!
….our oven died, and I have to get new tires. Fuck.
how did the oven die??